Stop the Waste

We were having breakfast this morning and noticed a mother and two children at the nearby table. She had ordered the same meal for her two children of pre-school age, plus a coffee (!) and a large glass of water for the boy.

Looking at them we already anticipated that the children wouldn’t be able to finish the food on their plates. Sure enough, 15 minutes later the plates were pushed aside, almost untouched, and the mother ordered something else for the boy.

When they left to pay for their food, there were almost two full servings left behind and the coffee.

My husband said people waste because they’ve never known hardship. I disagree. I’ve never known hardship. I was blessed with a childhood where I had just about everything I wanted – we weren’t rich, but we were never lacking.

I was taught not to waste, and the green movement was just picking up pace when I was a teenager. I diligently used both sides of paper, ripped out unused pages for scrap paper, tried my hardest not switch on the air-conditioning unit every day, recycled what I could, argued with people who left the water running, supported any retailer that had a ‘Not Tested on Animals’ or ‘Biodegradable’ label on it, or any product that was made from recycled materials.

The whole idea of being eco-friendly has become so much more complicated since then, and encompasses so much more than what my idealistic mind could grasp back then. But at the core of it is a very simple message – stop wasting.

Stop wasting food – it’s sickening to see parents order full portions for toddlers who will only manage a few mouthfuls; disgusting to see plates being cleared from a table where five women have each ordered individual meals and left more than half of each uneaten; incredibly frustrating to see people out for dinner order a starter, entree and dessert without any single item being finished.

Come on people. It’s not just about the cooked food that’s gone to waste – it’s the amount of resources and the effort of people who had worked so hard to grow the food and rear the animals for their meat, and the processes and transportation necessary to get the food to your table…all this just so you can throw most of it away?

There’s nothing wrong with sharing a portion. If your favourite restaurant can’t respect that, then they don’t respect the food which is their livelihood and they don’t deserve to be in the food business.

Please stop and think for a moment the next time you sit down for a meal.

I had lunch with a former colleague once, who said to me, “Well it makes no difference to starving people whether I finish my food or not. It’s not like I can go and give them my food.”

Well no, of course it’s not so simplistic as that. But there is a chain reaction that occurs when consumers make a stand. It happens everywhere, and in today’s world where just about every consumer behavior is noted and analysed, businesses do take note of what customers want.

When I was a teenager, there were only a handful of brands I could get my hands on that were known to be eco-friendly in some way. Today, my FB page is filled with news about innovative products, people, structures, furniture, clothing etc that are re-purposed, resource-efficient, or designed to undo a little bit of the damage we’ve inflicted on this planet. There are entire businesses, catalogues and conferences showcasing products and services that continue to bring awareness to new heights.

So don’t try to make excuses, or pretend that your actions can’t make a difference. I’m not a saint, but I try. It’s impossible to untangle the chain of supply to ensure that everything we buy and consume is good for the planet, and many eco labels remain too expensive for the average person, but there are so many other things we can do if we can just make that small, conscious effort to Stop the Waste.

List-ing

I love making lists. There’s something extremely fulfilling about knowing exactly what I need to do for the day, or what I need to buy, books I need to get…Just completing the list feels like an accomplishment, makes me feel organized and in control.

But sometimes what looks so neat and orderly on paper is anything but, and the hours and days that go by with a list uncompleted is like a load of bricks on my mind. Sometimes it’s because the task is reliant on some external factor for completion or perhaps it’s more complicated or tedious than it first appeared to be. Or sometimes it’s simply because I spend hours and days trying to avoid it.

At times like these, it feels like lists take on a life of their own. I have so many – to-do lists, ‘work completed’ lists, birthday/Christmas lists, wish lists, shopping lists, things I like, things to look forward to….

I like lists because they help me feel like I’m in control, always prepared. But lists sometimes give me the false impression that I can control everything, that I can always be prepared. In theory I suppose it makes sense, but my mind seriously doesn’t work like that. In fact, I don’t work like that, because I love making lists but I am usually really bad about using them.

I have issues with following all my lists and schedules, the same way I have issues following recipes and instruction manuals. Something inside me freezes up and my mind goes blank. Don’t ask me why. I can read a recipe and think ‘hey, I can make that!’ yet freeze up when the ingredients are in front of me. It’s like some sort of disconnect, a computer hanging, a ‘does not compute’ sign popping up over my head.

Granted, I do occasionally get to cross out items on my to-do list but I’ve come to realize that some lists aren’t meant to be completed. I have journals from my college days that list out ‘things to look forward to’, people to see, gifts to make. Although they’re no longer relevant, I can’t bear to throw them away. Just like my journals, they’re a part of me and throwing them away would mean throwing away part of my history.

So I’ll continue making my lists. It’s gotten me this far, and I know my life will be filled with many more.

The Folly of Fund-raising

Every year around this time, I find myself surrounded by fund-raising efforts of every size, shape and colour. And every year, I’m struck by the same feeling – the vast majority of these consist of impractical little trinkets or the same kind of dull items being offered year after year, like key chains and Christmas cards, pens and car stickers.

When I saw this Freshly Pressed piece, 11 Holiday Gift Programs That Benefit Nonprofits and Make the World A Better Place :: 2011 Edition, it reminded me of a great divide – locally, many of the charities and fund-raising activities I’ve observed are severely limited in imagination, and I personally feel most people give out of guilt rather than any belief that what they are doing actually helps.

Christmas cards, key chains, notebooks, car stickers…I’m so tired of seeing these things, for two reasons. Firstly, how many of these things are actually put to use? They’re more likely to end up in the trash, and that is the second reason why it’s distasteful to me – materials and resources are being used up that will only end up being thrown away. It’s pure waste being generated, with a tiny sum going to the charity in question.

And I really can’t help feeling sorry for the charities – they need the money. Heaven knows they need the money and the support. But they have so little to work with – I’ve come across so many instances where volunteers have no idea what they’re doing there, where the people responsible for fund-raising have no experience doing so (hence the same old thing year after year), and where the common disposition is that it doesn’t need to be done professionally, because it’s JUST a charity, JUST volunteer work.

It’s just so wrong, and I wonder if it’s because most charities and other NGOs here are not paid at all, in contrast to many societies and organizations overseas which have skilled people running things, people who are there to make a difference and not just to look good or feel good without having to do anything significant beyond saying “I volunteered’.

I don’t feel inspired to volunteer for events that generate more waste than good, like so-called fund-raising dinners, or maybe I just don’t have the disposition to deal with a situation where things are being poorly handled.

I suppose the solution would be to dive right in and make everything right myself? I can hear potential responses and accusations already ie ‘get off YOUR butt and do something about then!’ Or perhaps ‘quit complaining and get your hands dirty first, before you open your big fat mouth’.

I have nothing but respect and admiration for the people who do the work, and yes, when it comes right down to it, I am ashamed that I don’t get my hands dirty. It’s a hurdle I have yet to overcome, for a variety of reasons, although I do donate and support several charities.

But it brings me back to the same point – that the scope or impact of my donations feel hollow, insignificant. With that in mind, I suppose there’s no hope of my ending on a positive note, as I would prefer, but I do have hope that people can make a difference – there are already so many out there who do, and so many more like me who wish they could be more like them yet find it so difficult to do so.

To anyone reading this who pours their blood, sweat and tears into organizations that help others – human, animal or environmental – thanks for being great examples for the rest of us. I was told once that ‘there are many ways to serve’ and I’m still looking for my ‘way’, and if you’re anything like me, I hope the advice works for you too.

Faith, Hope and Love

'Together as One' programme booklet

Last night, I attended a choral performance called ‘Together as One – Faiths united through choral music”.

Not the most attention-grabbing theme and I honestly didn’t know what to expect. I’m a tad sceptical about attending any kind of performance because I don’t like being let down. That said, my brother’s recommendations – and performances – have never let me down yet.

In fact, I usually find myself reluctant to attend any kind of performance – you’ve got to buy tickets, be there on time, put up with miscellaneous annoyances that range from traffic to inconsiderate audience members, etc.

But once I’m there and the performance starts, I can’t imagine wanting to be anywhere else. There’s something magical when the auditorium dims and the stage lights up, and these incredibly brave and talented individuals step forward to sing their hearts out. It awes me that they can literally pour themselves into their art, bare themselves to an audience and – most importantly – do it with so much joy and enthusiasm.

‘Together as One’ was no different, and each time I attend a great performance like this one, I am convinced that it is the best I’ve ever seen, the most beautiful I’ve ever experienced. From the start, the musical arrangement, the vocals and performance was captivating and there were times I felt I could just close my eyes and drift away. Never mind that the songs were in different languages, from Arabic and Hindi to Latin and Mandarin; I couldn’t understand any of it, but it enveloped me nonetheless.

The production was put together by Susanna Saw as Musical Director and supported by performing arts stalwarts Joe Hasham and Faridah Merican, together with Lex Lakshman Balakrishnan (Choreographer), Tracy Wong (Music Director) and Caipifruta Vocal Quartet (Tracy Wong, Lai Suk Yin, Aaron Teoh and Joel Wong), and featured 32 members of The Young KL Singers.

Dressed in muted colours with bare feet, they sang, stomped, danced and clapped their way through 16 songs that “celebrate faith, respect, and most importantly, unity.” Opening with the haunting Azan (Islamic call to prayer, better known as ‘Bilal’ in Malaysia) and working their way through to the Asatoma Satgamaya (a mantra found in the Brihadaranyaka Upanishad, a philosophical text considered to be an early source of the Hindu religion), the Ave Maria (Hail Mary) and Buddhist ‘Compassion for Mankind’, the effect was both stunning and mesmerising.

Though the full programme was only an hour long, it felt timeless as they wound their way through prayers, chants and devotions that have resonated through billions of individuals over thousands of years. Closing with ‘We are One’ (a Bahá´í Faith-inspired song) which moves me to tears even thinking about it, the entire presentation was a beautifully crafted musical message for human beings of every faith.

My heartfelt thanks goes out to all the singers, directors, sound technicians, stage crew, volunteers, sponsors and everyone else involved who made this possible. You guys are incredible.

‘Together as One – Faiths united through choral music” is presented by the Young Choral Academy and The Actors Studio. Opening night was Wednesday, 9 November @ 8.30pm and nightly performances continue until Saturday, 12 November before ending with a matinee on Sunday, 13 November. Tickets are RM30; programme booklets available for a minimum donation of RM5. Limited tickets still available; call KLPAC @ Sentul Park: 04-4047 9000 / The Actors Studio @ Lot 10 : 03-2142 2009 / 03-2143 2009. For Walk-in : ILasso Tickets (A606, Block A, Phileo Damansara II, Petaling Jaya)

Entering the World of The Big Bad Wolf

My stash after one visit to the Big Bad Wolf Sale

I love books. Of course, there are many out there like me, but it’s nice to be part of a global bibliophile community – no registration required, just BYOB (bring your own book).

For some people, their lives are measured in movies or music that played a key role in pivotal moments, which have stayed with them through years of change. I’d add books to that list.

My childhood can be measured from the Ladybird collection my parents invested in, to Enid Blyton and Greek/Roman/Norse mythology, to Nancy Drew, Alfred Hitchcock’s Three Investigators and the decades-old copies of Reader’s Digest up to my college fascination with fiction and fantasy which now range from Eoin Colfer’s Artemis Fowl to Eddings and Feist, Arthurian myths and my current fascination with James Rollins’ Sigma Force and Michael Reilly’s ongoing series on the exploits of Jack West, Jr.

Hardly the stuff of classic literature (which I studied, and loved, in college) but they have a special place in my heart, and on my bookshelf.

Hence the recently concluded Big Bad Wolf sale – like most book sales – was an exercise in strategy, booklust and restraint. Strategy was required because there were 1.5 million books arrayed in a huge exhibition hall, and I didn’t want to miss any of it!

Booklust…need I say more?

Self-restraint was necessary for, as a former colleague very aptly said, “Space is finite” and that sadly applies to my bookshelf as well. For every book I bought, there were at least 5 more I reluctantly put down. Sigh.

Now it’s over and all that remains are the bags of books in my living room – I haven’t quite figured out a more permanent home for them yet, but I’m already looking forward to next year.

My life in Midkemia

With the recent ‘epic finale’ of the Harry Potter series, a lot of fans have been gone through an emotional upheaval – it’s really over.  But while I became a HP fan totally by accident, the characters that have shaped my life and stayed with me for over half my lifetime are the ones I met in Raymond E Feist’s Riftwar Saga.

My bruised,, battered and much-loved original set of the Riftwar Saga

Ironically, I got ‘involved’ by accident too. I was into Greek mythology and Arthurian novels and a friend just dumped the final book, A Darkness at Sethanon, on me. She’d read it and hadn’t liked it; I looked at it rather sceptically. It had been through countless hands, courtesy of a book rental service. The cover, which depicted a man in black armour on a fiery horse – later I would learn it was Murmandamus on a daemonsteed – was battered and bruised and just generally unappealing.

But I took it anyway and gave it a shot. And I fell in love with Jimmy and Locky, Arutha and Amos, Laurie and Pug, Martin Longbow and Kulgan and all the rest. After just one read, without even knowing what had gone before, I was hooked.

The Riftwar Saga was my first foray into fantasy and while I’ve read many others, the characters stay with me still, and I still get teary-eyed when a favourite character dies even though I’ve read the books enough times to quote not just lines but whole paragraphs.

I’ve read and re-read them, taped them and re-taped them when the original tape fell off, loaned them to friends who stayed up half the night just to find out what happens next, and yesterday I just re-taped Magician:Master so my 13-year-old daughter could read it without the pages falling out.

The parallels between the characters in Feist and those in classic Arthurian novels doesn’t escape me, nor the fact that it mirrors Star Wars mythology. I suppose it’s a universal theme that resonates with many – the humble beginnings of an individual who is thrust into traumatic circumstances only to find that this is exactly what he/she was born to do. Add in the wise mentors and loyal friends, and it’s hard not to root for them.

In the Riftwar saga, what touched me most were the characters and how real they were to me. All their confusion and doubts and anxieties, the idealism of honour and duty, and the sure sense of who they were and what they were doing. Maybe that’s what caught hold of me – wanting to know who I was and what kind of person I was going to be. In fact, maybe it’s what we all secretly wish for ourselves – to be absolutely certain of who we are and what we need to do in this life, despite the anxieties of growing up, and having the guidance and support of mentors and friends we have complete faith in, and who likewise believe in us without an ounce of doubt.

Following Pug to Kelewan and back, trailing after Jimmy through the Thieves’ Highway, hanging on to Arutha’s belt all over Krondor with the secret police hot on his heels, feeling the heave of the ocean swells as Amos gets them all through the Straits of Darkness….

All these and more became a backdrop as familiar to me as my own home, and the characters have become my best friends. In fact, each time I re-read the original set of books, it feels like I’m re-visiting a favourite place, a place that’s comforting and reminds me of the best things in life – friendship, wonder, inner strength, and hope. Now that’s magical.

Walking, Talking Library

When I was a child, I discovered the ‘Choose Your Own Adventure’ series. The first one I picked up was #54, Magic of the Unicorn, and I couldn’t put it down. The series tells the story with the reader as the main character, and every few pages you get to choose between two or more options – if you choose A, go to this page; if you choose B, go to this page. Some of them lead to some rather unpleasant endings, but it was fascinating nonetheless. After a few rounds of abrupt endings and frantic backtracking, I developed a stack of numbered slips that I used in place of bookmarks, so I could find each crossroad easily.

I also went on a mission to complete my collection – I just had to get them all, starting with the 53 books preceding my much-loved #54, which I proudly announced to my mother that “it’s really good, you should read it”.

There were so many to choose from, with fantastic titles like The Forbidden Castle, Secret of the Ninja, The Case of the Silk King, Forest of Fear, Trumpet of Terror….

The only problem was the books cost RM3.95 each, and I could get through a title in under two hours. So after my mom’s exasperation over repeated requests for funds, I resorted to volunteering for extra chores around the house, to supplement my savings and weekly allowance.

After all the hard work of washing cars and bathrooms, scrubbing grungy walls and the front porch, that collection was very precious to me. After all, I had to earn it, and heaven help anyone who lost one.

To ensure this would never happen, I got a file and listed down each title in my collection. If anyone wanted to borrow a book, I would note their name and the date on which the book left my care. I felt quite certain that, this way, I would never lose a single one.

Naturally, it had to happen. A classmate borrowed a book from the series and repeatedly forgot to return it, before admitting that she’d lost it. She paid me back for it of course (at least, I think she did), and the memory of how upset I was made this blog posting by the Boston Book Bums all the more hilarious for me.

Today, my collection proudly stands at more than 50 titles – although the collection went into the 100s, it was difficult finding some of the older books, and the cost of the books kept rising – from my first book at RM3.95, it soon went on to become RM4.50, then RM4.95 and so on until the price doubled and at that point I sadly admitted to myself that an era had ended.

Yellowed, dog-eared, cellophane-taped and even annotated, I love them still and bring them out for an occasional read after 25 years.

I recently discovered a few copies in Borders, and it gave me such a thrill to see them! Check out the series at the official Choose Your Own Adventure website.

Two months and counting

I started this blog almost a year ago, wanting to fulfill my desire to write. I imagined it would come easily but then my brain took over from my heart and threw up a whole series of roadblocks, and I’ve not even managed one blog per month.

It was always a matter of “when I have the time…”

Time to think it through, time to consider what I want to say, time to figure out what I want my blog to accomplish, time to get it just right…basically time for anything and everything except just getting down to writing.

And then I changed jobs, which gave me the freedom to work from home more often than not. Perfect, I thought to myself. I’ll finally have time to work on my blog!

Surprise. It’s been more than two months now, and this, my first post in all that time, is about how I never get around to it.

While I’ve spent lots of time thinking about blogging (that counts for something, doesn’t it?) I have to say thank you to Mindy, whose blog post 3 Things I’ve Learned from a Month of Blogging kinda gave me the little kick I needed to do this.

And that’s really all I can ask for – to hope that whatever I write is of some use to someone, somewhere.

PS: Thanks for reading.

Staring at myself

I’m often paralysed by thinking too much. All too often, I get inspired and want to share it, but then I start thinking…

How should I share it? Should I write in my journal? Share it on Facebook? Blog about it? If I blog about it, how do I get it just right? How do I get my blog to read like all those other blogs that have inspired me?

The blogs I love most ooze sincerity. It doesn’t matter if they’re writing about food, or a work experience, or something they’ve read in the news. They feel strongly about what they’re sharing, so it’s not just fluff or empty words. They are sharing something they are passionate about, which somehow enriches my life by giving me a new perspective on things mundane, comical or touching.

I want to write like that.I want to have people read what I write and feel something, anything. It could be a laugh or a chuckle, a resigned sigh of agreement or a nod of approval, it doesn’t matter.

My friends might say that I do write well. But the problem is, it’s hard to see yourself as others see you. The view is just too different when you’re looking at yourself.

So I’ve gone searching in the opposite direction, scouring blogs like The Happiness Project and even going so far as to read sales self-help books like You, Inc. in an attempt to gain a different perspective of who I am and the world around me, and I’m pleasantly surprised and even a little proud of myself.

I don’t take criticism well, and I’m not a fan of step-by-step instructions – something in me rebels at the thought of it (and that includes following recipes and reading instruction manuals) – but in casting my net a little wider, a little farther than my own little sphere, I have learned some things about myself. Some of them aren’t flattering, while others are simple reminders to reinforce what I believe in, but either way I feel better for it.

A quote I saw this morning, which I posted on Facebook, was “If you can’t feed a hundred people, then just feed one.” ~ Mother Teresa

It reminded me of the advice I gave a close friend, who felt overwhelmed by all the things in his life that didn’t seem to be going right. We were only 16 then, but somehow that same wisdom came to me – you don’t need to change everything, all at once. Just change one thing, and others will follow.

Here’s to change, and the hope that I’ll see someone a little better, a little stronger, the next time I look at myself.

Random thoughts on perception pt1

I have a strong aversion to buying skincare/cosmetics from Japanese brands, and unfortunately this extends to brands that sound Japanese. Reason being, I grew up when the environment and animal rights issues were gaining popularity, and one of the things that I was strongly against was whaling for commercial purposes. As the Japanese are the main perpetrators, and whale blubber is used in producing skincare and cosmetics (among other things), therefore I want nothing to do with those products. The sentiment is so strong that I will look at a manufacturing company and put it back if it looks/sounds like it’s a Japanese company.

In recent years, the repeated news of recalls due to dangerous substances/improper manufacturing processes found in China-made products has made me extremely cautious of anything that comes from there, be it food, toys, stationery, household items, toiletries.

The way I see it, China-made products are so cheap because there is no regulation or control or proper processes in place to manufacture items properly or dispose of by-products safely.

I suppose the situation is similar in India and many other countries, but (from what I understand) part of the problem here is one of scale – many poorer nations have few or non-existant regulations, but much of their industry is small in scale while China manufactures for half the world, including the largest corporations hence the damage inflicted is much higher.

I’m sure there are companies in China with good practices, but the vast majority of cheap items flooding shops and markets all over the world are environmentally detrimental from the day they start the production process, right up to the time they wind up broken in landfills.